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Weird Vermont - Truth is Stranger than Fiction

Sometimes weird things happen and folks like to just forget that they ever happened. Below are some articles that most people in Vermont would just as soon banish to the outhouse forever. Vermont is famous for ghost stories but these infamous tales are perhaps skeletons best left in the closet.

Some things are best not seen
2007. The Select Board of Brattleboro, VT are considering a permanent anti-nudity ordinance that would be voted on by the town. Brattleboro adopted a temporary ban this summer, after the town got a reputation for people hanging out in the nude. Business owners complained nude strollers would scare away paying customers.

Grave Robbing in Vermont
In April 2005, a Vermont teenager was accused of breaking into a tomb in Morrisville, opened the lid of a casket and removing the head of a corpse with a hacksaw. He stole eyeglasses and a bow tie from the dead man. He then wrapped the head in plastic bags and hid it near his apartment. Police reported that Buckalew's friends told them he planned to use the skull for a marijuana bong.

Police could not believe what they had heard. But it was true. Someone had broken into a tomb, broken open the casket and removed a man's head. "We had the funeral director come to the scene and we pulled the casket out. Yes, indeed, we found remains and they had been disturbed," says the Chief. 17-year-old Nicholas Buckalew admitted that he broke into a tomb at the local cemetery, removed the head of the cadaver and brought it to his home. The teen reportedly told friends that he planned to leave the head outside to dry and would then bleach it, a police affidavit said. He told friends he wanted to the use the skull as a water pipe to smoke marijuana.

17 year old Nickolas Buckalew was charged with unauthorized removal of a dead body. He plead innocent and was held for lack of $100,000 bail.

Remains and evidence were found in a silo near the suspect's home outside the village and 2/10ths of a mile from the cemetery. Police reported that "Within minutes we found the duffle bug with the remains in it and tools that was used to enter the tomb and the casket."

The victim's widow, the only family member in the area, was told of the vandalism. "The widow was in shock," says the Chief. "She did not want any information. She did not want to know any details."

"He was a peculiar person put it that way. He was peculiar."

Under a plea agreement Buckalew faces 1 to 7 years in prison.

What do you want on your sandwich?
In 1995, police in Rutland, VT and Piscataway, N.J., charged men with assault during domestic fights. Specifically, the act of head-butting the women. The latter case involved the president of the local school board, who police said got involved in a fight over what kind of bread should be used in a sandwich.

Dead Men Tell No Tales
Vermont authorities revoked the funeral home license of Larry H. Titemore of St. Johnsbury in April. He was accused of mishandling almost every burial he supervised during 6 years of business. Violations ranging from failure to store bodies properly to failure to embalm to switching bodies to lower-cost coffins.

Vermont Chainsaw Massacre - another movie?
At sentencing in November 1995 in Brattleboro, Vt., for killing his father with a chain saw, Kevin Record, 28, was asked by the judge if he had any regrets. Said Record, "One of the main regrets that I have is that I wasn't able to take the chain saw to the rest of my family."

Remember the movie 'Ben" about the guy obsessed with rats?
In July 1994, the town council in Peru, Vt., ordered Roland Williams out of his house for a month while authorities cleaned the place up. Williams had been purchasing large quantities of dog food and cola every day to feed the hundreds of rats that had been gathering on his property.

An obsession with Hilary Clinton
Fact. There's a guy in Island Pond who was obsessed with Hilary Clinton (God only knows why!). On one occasion, he attempted to send his own artistic creation to the White House insured for 3 million dollars. UPS promptly said "no way" and refused to deliver his package. Undeterred, a short time later he sent what appeared to be a box of gunpowder to a government office in Washington D.C. Needless to say, there was a big panic and he made the CBS Evening News. Thankfully, this was before the anthrax scares and 9/11. After determining that this unfortunate fellow was possibly a "few pickles shy of a barrel", Agent Mulder and the other FBI's let him be. Maybe they were afraid of the swastikas painted all over the outside of his house. Trust no one!

Every state has some crazy old laws. Vermont is certainly among them. Here are some violations that just cannot be excused. No wonder the prisons are crowded!

• Women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth.
• It is illegal to deny the existence of God.
• It is illegal to whistle underwater.

Thank God we've got Teddy Miller the Constable in Island Pond who will diligently enforce these heinous crimes! Update - Teddy Miller was recently (March 2008) voted out of office after a 24-year run.